And the years pass by...

I was truly tempted to change the prior post. It's been nearly two years since I put this blog up, thinking that it might encourage me to get off my fat ass and get into shape, but apparently it hasn't.

No need to put up a new picture-- exactly the same weight (281 lbs - I weighed myself today), with the same general body shape - Stay Puft Marshmallow Man with a tan.

What's amazing about the whole thing is that you'd think that if I had just come up with a plan and stuck to it, over two years I would have lost well over 100 lbs (my primary goal) and had the pics to show everyone. But no-- I chose to treat my body like a trash compactor and assuming that its as resilient as it ever was.

But the absolute truth is that it isn't. I have type 2 diabetes, and every day that I go on eating junk food and other foods that are generally bad for me, my body gets more worn out. I assume my kidneys are getting hammered, though I haven't felt anything indicating as much just yet-- but I know it's coming. Unless I make a turn around for the better.

To a certain extent it's not just about physique (last time I checked, the sexy girls weren't generally after the rotund and unhealthy man), though I would be lying if I said that physique wasn't definitely a factor in my desire to shrink. I have been at the point since 2004 (and now quite possibly well beyond) of a breakdown in my overall health. Diabetes is kind of a silent killer, because you don't really feel anything until you do something stupid, like not taking your pills, or eating sugary garbage for years expecting that the pills you take will prevent your eventual death from complications from or caused by the illness (I fall into the latter category).

Just because I don't have diabetic retinopathy (according to my eye doctor at my visit earlier this year) doesn't mean that I won't eventually go blind. Just because I don't have the symptoms of diabetic neuropathy, it doesn't necessarily mean that it's not happening.

I let my blood sugar get out of control over the last two years, so much so that I am now taking two types of diabetes medications. I have not been prescribed straight insulin - yet, and it's not something I ever want to have happen. I can reverse this, I can lose the weight and go back to good health. I KNOW I CAN. I have done it before.

The point is to do it permanently.